Dead

In the loving memory of
Muhammad Syaiful
29/05/1984 - 01/02/2008
A loving son.
A very loyal friend.

He died at such a young age leaving lots of thing behind. He died by his own will. It seems like he just had too much on his mind and it leads him to his death. He will be missed by all his friends and especially his family. A person who always smiles and seems like never really show his emotion much to his family but he was much closer to his friend. He never gives up on his belief and always have high hopes in every thing he does. He's not a quitter but I guess everyone has its limit and today we see how fragile human minds are when comes to stressed up situation. He left us a note before he plunge to his death and it seems he want us to read his last words before he left this world.





"Beloved family and friends. It has been a while that I've shared my problems with you. I thought I could do it by myself but I guess because of me trying to be kind to the people I love the most, I didn't want you to get involve. I was looking for another answer to my problems but all this while and silence, I was so lost, I couldn't find them. As close as I could get it, it leads me to a new problem and they keep adding up and I just couldn't seems to handle it well. Anyway I just want to thank you for being there for me always. My family. My friends. My love ones. I'm seriously in your debt but seems like I didn't have the chance to repay them. Before I leave this world I pray for your safety living in this harsh world. Always be strong in what ever you do and never give up. I didn't give up. It's just that I'm going to die too either way I took this jump or not. At least I leave this world a momentarily flight. Smile and be happy always. I love you."







Well I'm still alive. That's for sure. It was just a scenario of a situation. I thought to be more realistic I use my own name and my own feelings of why I would do a suicide. As much as I do hate living in this world but I don't have enough strength to move to that step so I'm pretty much confident that I won't do it.





Anyway why death? I don't know really but seems like a place where I always sits about 4 years ago brings me back all those memories where I always thought to just die and not live again. It just bring back those emotions that I kept so long but the situation above have nothing to do with my own personal life. I was just exaggerating things as part of the feelings I had 4 years ago.






So what is my point in talking about death? It wasn't just death. It was more like suicide and leaving behind everything just because you can't solve the problems on your own. Come to think of it I was just trying to be considerate that I didn't want other people to be involve in my problems so I distant myself from my friends and family. Then the problems just keeps piling up like nobody business so it leads me to suicide. Sick but it's just a scenario.





Anyway this is just one of the reason why suicide happens. There's a lot more of other situation like drugs, pregnancy, break ups, financial and anything under the sun that you could think of. Some even kill them self because their pets died so they want to die together. Sick bastard. Fall in love with a man or a woman. Never an animal. Seriously I hate those suicidal people. Even sometimes I think of it too but to do a suicide means you are just a coward. There's always a solution to everything that we do in this world. Even if you're infected with a disease it doesn't means you could do a suicide because you feel that you rather die then lived with the humiliation. It's just wrong. Live your life to the fullest.






Still suicide doesn't ends there. There's suicide bombings too. Now that is wickedly sick bastards. They thought by doing it would be to a such honor. My hairy ass honor that I'll give you. Seriously I just can't see why these people actually do such suicide bombing? Don't they appreciate their own life? Or are they THAT stupid thinking they would go to heaven if they do such honorable job? More like stupid job. I really pity those people who got trap in those brainwashed situation and worst, especially in suicide bombings.






So there's two types of suicide so far I know. One is personal suicide. The other is terrorist suicide. Still both of them are the most stupid thing on Earth. I just can't believe they really think suicide is the answer. Have they ever thought that their problems never leave? It just keeps adding up even if you leave this world. The one affected are your close ones. Don't you care for any of them? If you do then don't attempt suicide. Don't even think of suicide because it's stupid.




I am also stupid just thinking of it but I'm still smart. Why?














Because I'm alive.



RedRulz.